You Know You’re A Parent When:
1: You find yourself giving some other guy advice on child proofing his kitchen whilst standing in the hardware store
2: You now shop in the “Kids” section rather than the “Baby” section of department stores. it doesn’t take long before you realise two disturbing things about children’s fashion. A: Knee high boots and bikinis shouldn’t be made that small. B: All the kids wear is better looking and better made than that adult stuff.
3: Now you have finally started being able to have your own breakfast and lunch without sharing your baby’s from lack of time and energy when your baby now starts stealing half of yours!
4: “It’s a duck, it’s a boat, it’s a bath toy!… NO, it’s a floating turd!” That’s correct. She’s never done it before and all of a sudden your baby will develop strange new habits like deciding to do her number 2′s when she is in the bath. The Learning curve never seems to straighten out.
5: Baby talk. Talking to your baby at this age is a lot like talking to an adult that doesn’t speak English. They tend to cling to a phrase and nod a lot.
Mum: Do you want to go on the Swings?
Baby: Pie Pie!
Mum: No we can’t go on the slide it’s wet
Baby: Pie Pie?
Mum: It’s ok, we can come back another day
Baby: (Nods) Pie Pie…
Then when you least expect it..
Mum: Lets get ready for bed.
Baby:…. Bottom Pond.
….. ? Who can say, the wonders of children at 11 months old.
Floating turd? Goodness me, I’ve just spat my cup of tea out! Yes we too have been through that one (it’s when they’re not very well and they aren’t as ‘formed’ as they should be, you have to worry – sorry!)